By: Liza

Liza — Sun, 02 Mar 2008 15:16:13 +0000

I understand your response…however…a few years ago I was meeting with a vice president of a local bank who I’d painstakingly been working with for two years. The goal was to get a loan to help my business grow. This particular afternoon he looked at me and said, “You know, I think you’d be better off finding a sugar daddy to finance this idea than you would getting a loan.”
I wasn’t stunned, as being in business as long as I have, I’ve embraced the reality that I have to work harder and smarter than many men to get where I go (I actually love the fact that it makes me smarter and harder working!)
But I did sit there thinking, “I’m screwed here. Because if I speak out, he’s going to say, ‘I was just joking…don’t you have a sense of humor?’ And if I don’t, I invite more of the same behavior and encourage him to be equally as disrespectful to women (and men, and Hispanics, and whatever) who come along behind me.”
I left without saying anything, and I told two male friends and two female friends about it. The women both wanted me to go back in and make a fuss and file a complaint. It was actually the two guys who were most upset, but they both had the most reasonable advice: Take your business elsewhere.
So I did. I wrote the president of the bank a letter and explained that if two years of explaining a business that is about empowering people of all shapes, genders, cultures, etc…did not enlighten his VP, then this bank clearly did not deserve to benefit from my hard work.
Filing a complaint would have allowed the bank to question whether the incident even happened, and it would have been a VP’s word against mine. I chose to say, “When this happened, you lost business.)
I hadn’t even thought about this story in a long time, until today. The comment “we all need a laugh” after the “bitch” comment brought back memories and felt a little too familiar.
We all can do better than that. And on behalf of the people who are influenced by our behavior even when we don’t realize it…we should.

By: Dana

Dana — Sat, 01 Mar 2008 14:29:51 +0000

I hear ya, but it was more about the perception of the gender bias. If we get stuff done we are a b!it@h, not always. I just thought it was funny and sometimes we need a good laugh.

By: Liza

Liza — Fri, 29 Feb 2008 05:26:26 +0000

Bitches may get things done…but bitches also derive pleasure from hurting other people, just because they can. No good has ever come from that, whether it originated in an X or a Y chromosome.

Comments on: I’m One are YOU?

By: Liza

By: Dana

By: Liza