Rush Limbaugh is engaged and I am offended.
Posted by: Donna
My very first post on Democratic Diva (which I tried to retrieve but is gone for some reason – Krista!!) was a facetious declaration of my disapproval of May-December marriages. I rewrote the Legislature’s anti-gay marriage resolution to reflect my views, which I will recreate (Krista?!) to the best of my ability here:
Section 1. Only a union of one man and one woman, where the man is no more than five years older than the woman, shall be valid or recognized as a marriage in this state.
December-May marriages – like the very cool Demi and Ashton match – would be permitted because…whatever. Because I say so.
It’s important for the preservation of the fabric of society that men are not permitted to go off and marry women several years younger than themselves. Because I don’t like it uh I mean the children! Yeah, that’s it, the children! It’s Adam and Eve, not Adam and Hannah Montana!
Seriously, this permissive attitude toward men marrying women several years younger than them is causing smart women to eschew marriage and motherhood because they figure, what the hey, he’s going to dump me for a newer model at some point so why should I take the chance?
Yeah, maybe the May-December thing is a bigger threat to hetero marriage than the gays. All kidding aside.
Rush Limbaugh is getting married for the fourth time. He is 58 and his bride-to-be is 32, or 28, depending on which reports you believe. This is in flagrant violation of my edict that no man should be more than five years older than his bride, in order that their marriage be viewed as legal. I should point out that none of Limbaugh’s previous unions have produced offspring, which is supposedly the purpose of marriage that social conservatives are forever banging on about as their reason for opposing same-sex marriage.
Why does Rush Limbaugh hate children? Probably because he’s a deviant who marries women more than five years younger than him.
Marriage. One man. One woman. With the man being no more than five years older than the woman. That’s marriage. Anything else is just wrong.
I’m just saying.
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Actually I would suggest a caveat here:
If he’s a horny old (rich) fool (like Rush) then she should be allowed to marry him if they live in a community property state and he waives the pre-nup.
$50,000,000.00 can cure a lot of ills.
Marriage number 4 and I have no problem with old guys marrying younger women as long as old women can marry younger guys.
Or if I can perform Donna’s marriage. I likes performing weddings.
Rush makes a mockery of marriage, and you thought the gays would. Ms. Rogers’ REAL payday will come when her 10-year contract to act as Rush’s beard is over, just like it did for Marta. Like Marta, she won’t even have to live in the same house as Rush. Do a Google search of Limbaugh+gay. Do you think Clarence Thomas will be fool enough to marry Rush again? There’s a risk Rush will take so much Viagra that he’ll lose his eyesight. Then he’ll be both deaf and dumb.
I should point out that none of Limbaugh’s previous unions have produced offspring,
Why are my feline senses smelling a beard?
Age is nothing more than a number, my dear. Furthermore, being “smart” seems to have little bearing on emotional maturity.
Bloat, addiction, and hate are, however, more sound reasons to prohibit a marriage. Ultimately, though, at least in our unbalanced culture, cash overcomes even disastrous genetics.
You don’t suppose the newlyweds will honeymoon in the Dominican Republic will you? (another google search, ‘Rush Limbaugh’ + ‘Dominican Republic’)
Marriage. One man. One woman.
Wow. You agree with Pat Robertson.