Trust fund baby Quayle generously opts out of his pension. But wasn’t generous enough to send you a holiday greeting.

01 Jan 2012 08:25 pm
Posted by: Donna

intrigue-Quaylea

I got my latest email from my member of Congress, one Benjamin Eugene Quayle (R) a little earlier today. He reminded his constituents of his commitment to not taking his federal pension.

As your representative, I have worked with my colleagues on both sides of the aisle to tackle these enormous challenges, and I have led by example. I recently made the decision that I would not be participating in the congressional pension plan. Currently, Members of Congress enjoy a pension plan that is far more generous than the majority of private-sector retirement plans. As we work to reduce America’s out-of-control debt, one of the areas in need of reform is the federal pension system. It would be the height of hypocrisy if Members of Congress proposed those reforms without first eliminating our own pensions. It addition to opting out, I also signed on to two similar bills by Reps. Tim Griffin (R-AR) and Mike Coffman (R-CO) that abolish the congressional pension plans.

It would also be the height of hypocrisy for a wealthy heir to demand that federal workers join screwed-over private sector workers in a race to the bottom. But when has hypocrisy ever stopped a rich conservative on an anti-peon crusade? Quayle’s proposal of eliminating Congressional pensions is not that impressive of a gesture as it is, considering how he is wealthy enough to have no need for a pension. But Quayle has to be elected twice more to qualify for the Congressional pension (you have to serve 5 years) and he has been redistricted into the same district with Rep. David Schweikert.

Rep. Quayle went on to whine about this:

Normally this time of year, there are certain greetings I would offer you. However, as you may have heard—just when you thought political correctness couldn’t go any further— Congressional rules forbid House Members from sending holiday good wishes to constituents. Upon hearing of this absurd rule before the Christmas holiday, I signed on to a resolution authored by Rep. Doug Lamborn (R-CO) which resolves the that the House of Representatives recognizes the importance of symbols and traditions of Christmas and strongly disapproves of attempts to ban references to the holiday. So please forgive if me If I sound rude for not offering you a Happy ____ _____ today. It’s not my rule!

Normally, Ben? When had you offered them? In your annual Brock Landers Dirty Scottsdale Seasons Greeting? This is your first term in Congress. You haven’t established any normal anything in that capacity.

Quayle is claiming that he was censored from sending holiday greetings by the meaniebutt Congressional staffers who control franking, AKA the mailing privilege Representatives enjoy. The actual guidelines, according the Fox News article I linked to, say this:

Members are unable at the current time to use official resources to record holiday greetings, post on social media/website, or send to constituents in franked mail or e-communications.

Expenses related to the purchase or distribution of greetings, including holiday celebrations, condolences, and congratulations for personal distinctions (wedding anniversaries, birthdays, etc.), are not reimbursable.”

Franking Manual:
4(a). Example of Nonfrankable Items
-Birthday, anniversary, wedding, birth, retirement or condolence messages and holiday greetings are prohibited.”

You may make reference to the season as a whole using language along the lines of ‘Have a safe and happy holiday season.’ It may only be incidental to the piece rather than the primary purpose of the communication.”

Which means Rep. Quayle could have used his own (considerable) funds to send me (his constituent) a nice greeting that filled in the _____ _______ part. It’s okay, Ben. I had a nice _____ _______ anyway.

4 Comments

  1. Comment by Jack on January 2, 2012 3:10 pm

    Maybe Congressman Brock Landers, I mean uh, Ben Qyaule, was too busy partying at the “frat house” where he lives with a few other members and he simply forgot to send a holiday card. With all the booze, drugs, and lose female lobbyists passing through that place, it’s hard to imagine when he has the time to do his job.

  2. Comment by Timmys Cat on January 3, 2012 9:23 am

    Hurry Little Benny, hurry! I know your outrage blinded you to those Hanunkkah cards you meant to send, but if you try your darndest you just might be able to send out those Happy Ramadan cards!

    Hah Little Benny and my critter David (don’ need no stinkin’ dollar bills) Schweikert may have to run against each other as the Smarmiest White Guy Evah! in the new redistricting.

    Happy New Year! May the Snark be with you!

  3. Comment by Timmys Cat on January 3, 2012 4:15 pm

    Ruh- roh Sinema is resigning to run for the new 9th where Benny lives. (you?)

    Bail Benny Bail!

  4. Comment by Terry on January 5, 2012 8:37 pm

    what a little prick

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